Change is necessary. Whether as an organization, in a relationship, or personally; change is necessary.
Why does change scare you?
Because…it means work is on the horizon.
As humans we are creatures of habit and when those habits have to change, that takes work.
Why can’t you lose 15 pounds? Because, it isn’t easy.
Have you ever heard someone say “Never change”. It is intended to be a compliment, one that is uplifting as they are trying to share that you have worth the way you are. They are right, you do. Yet, if you embraced that phrase fully, you may have a very unhappy life.
We should always be evolving.
When you are facing change in your life, I always encourage taking it one bite size piece at a time. Change is not easy and you should only expect progress in your behavior as you embrace and evolve through it.
When facing change: ask as many questions as you need to
The worst thing you can do when you are facing change is to remain silent. If your husband wants to change jobs, ask all of the important questions and listen. If you move to a new city, ask about any and everything about it. You can only learn if you are asking questions. Always ask these questions to learn and hear everything that is shared.
People will tell you things without consciously meaning to, and that will help guide you through the changes you’re facing. Hear the things they say with their body language, conversations they are having with others in your presence, and their responses to your questions. Open your mind to what could potentially help you grow.
Let go of “what should be”
Living life with a preconceived thought of how it should be will only lead you down a road of sadness. Life does not have a specific path of predictable circumstances. If you meet the love of your life and expect to live happily ever after but things go south and it ends, having the mentality of “this isn’t how it should be” can lead you down a dangerous road. No, it isn’t what you intended when you said your vows. It may not have even been what you wanted or had any control over.
Uttering the words “this isn’t how it should be” is an obvious sign you are feeling like you have no control.
Feeling like you have no control is normal. As humans we want to grasp at anything we can control, and during change that is even more apparent. Yet, we are not in control of anything except our behavior. So, let go of the expectations of how you think it should be and accept what is.
Re-evaluate your expectations during a time of change
When you are approaching a time of change it is easy to expect results. However, it is not healthy to tie expectations to results and therefore you can end up very stressed. If you reevaluate your expectations and be sure to tie them to behaviors then it will put things into perspective.
Have you been living in a new city for a few years yet still don’t have as many friends as you had in your hometown? If you are expecting to have 5 good friends, that is unhealthy.
Are you being a good friend by networking, joining mom groups, reaching out and engaging with other women? Then your expectations are healthy and those important friendships will find their way to you.
Be humble
Facing change is hard, but it is even harder if you are prideful. Understanding that you don’t know everything and sharing that is endearing. People appreciate vulnerability and humility. This also encourages relationship building and will help you establish those that may have never existed previously.
Humility opens doorways that you may have thought never would open. If you have the strength to drop your pride and share your true experiences, you will be respected, and change will not be as hard.
Know your values, and evolve
Evolving with the change you face in life is essential. You will face change in every area of your life and evolving with it will help you develop the skill of adaptation. However, it is important you are very confident in your values and never let those waver before you evolve.
You should know your values and allow those to remain steady, and when you face change allow yourself to evolve as a person. If you do not allow yourself to evolve you will endure unnecessary stress. Adapt to your surroundings to the limit of what your values allow and let go of your need to control.
Change is not easy for anyone and when you are facing intense change you need to take it one step at a time. Allow yourself time and peace to navigate through it. You are stronger than you believe and you deserve the grace you give to everyone else.
How do you best handle change? Share with me below in the comments.
XO,
3 Replies to “How to Embrace Change in 5 Easy Steps”
Great Post!!
Your recommendation on Expectations is right on!
Change can, absolutely, be scary. However, embracing change with a willingness to, at least, make an effort to implement whatever the change may be — for me, that’s how I approach change. Even if I have doubts about the change — I will still give it my best shot. If it works out – Great! If it doesn’t work out – well, I gave that change a chance & now it’s time to move on to the next step.
Thanks Sam! I agree, choosing to face change with an open mindset is extremely helpful. I have always been an odd ball and loved change because it means I’m about to be challenged!